Interesting that the below somehow couldn't get past FB's (apparent) censors. Odd, since nary a swear word in the mix. I would hate to see FB go the way of Fox, which carefully scrubs out (or doesn't post) comments that contains words they don't like (generally words unkind to Fox or conservatives or Republicans, though apparently one CAN refer to Obama by the "N" word in a comment with ease. But even Foxicans have had to resort to creative posting to get some of their comments through. Guess 2nd amendment rights trump 1st amendment rights. Pretty sad all the way around. Anyway, the URL for the article I *tried* posting, to no avail, on Facebook.
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/7695404/sarah_palins_wtf_moment_causes_a_few_pg3.html?cat=62
30 January 2011
...you ask me for a contribution...
To help alleviate some of the pain that political elections cause the mind, body, soul, and digestion system every 2 or 4 years, what we need in this country is An Every Incumbent Left Behind Act. Because frankly, this town really does need an enema.
UNENCUMBANT ACT OF 2011
The purpose of this act is to ensure that all voting citizens will be able to choose from a pool of candidates who exhibit common sense and stylish shoes, are well educated, rational, articulate, honest, well-coiffed, well-manicured, and just plain spiffy if solemn. (There are too many fugly people in Congress already. Don’t let any more in!) To assure all these requirements are met, from this day forward the following should become law of the land:
1) No one with the first name, maiden name, or surname of Bush, Kennedy, Kerry, Clinton, or Palin can run for higher office. Ever.
2) The name and person of Kenneth Starr shall be erased from mankind and history. So let it be written; so let it be done.
3) No candidate can have an income of more than $150,000 a year in the 10 years preceding running for office. It's about time the average American was actually represented BY an average American. All nominees must also have worked in the fast-food industry for at least 2 years at some point in their working career and have earned Employee Of The Month at least once during that time of employment.
4) All presidential candidates must be single and remain single while they serve. This way if the president wants to diddle someone with a cigar, it won't require 40 million dollars of taxpayer money to prove it. We might also be spared the hysterical ravings of the lunatic far left and far right who tout “family values” with one hand and fondle their or someone else's genitals with the other. It might also help keep certain members of Congress's legs in their *own* bathroom stall when they need to make use of public restroom facilities. Or deter them from going on 'weekenders' to South America while the rest of the state they supposedly represent wonders where the hell their representative IS.
5) Anyone running on a platform of “family values” or “traditional values” is immediately disqualified. Then stoned to death.
6) All candidates will be required to take a world geography and a spelling test.
7) Candidates will admit they inhaled. Often.
8) Everyone serving in the House, Senate, and White House must supply their own transportation and pay for their own vehicle, its maintenance, and gasoline usage. They'll be provided vouchers if they use public transportation. They must fly coach or business class, and have to stay at Holiday Inns when traveling domestically and in hostels when traveling abroad. They must pay for their own meals and the meals of special interests toadying up to them.
9) All lobbyists and special interest groups will be given 90 days to chose a new career path, after which time they will be burned at the stake or sent to North Korea.
10) All political parties will be abolished. No more Democrats, No more Republicans. No more Tea Party Patriots, No more Libertarians, Civiltarians, Vegetarians, Greenians, Martians, Lilliputians, or Rastafarians (well, maybe we'll keep Rastafarians). No more bullshit. Candidates run on their own merits with their own best ideas for their country’s betterment, not their party’s.
11) Taxes cannot be raised until 75% of the voting public agrees on the taxation, and those taxes can only be used to meet the needs of transportation, health, public safety (which includes police, fire, hospital), infrastructure, education, housing, and footwear. All social programs will be funded solely by voluntary taxation. You get to choose where your tax dollars go. No longer will you be forced to help pay for a billion-dollar bridge to nowhere or Donald Trump’s next bankruptcy.
12) All private and public contributions to all candidates will be banned forever. Candidates will be given 7 free airtime dates, an hour in length for each, on both network and cable news stations. The final 5 candidates will engage in 3 televised debates in which average citizens ask the questions and candidates aren’t prepped beforehand. All candidates will be given $350,000 from public monies to run for office. That’s it. Use the money wisely. Or go on a really fabulous cruise.
13) Any candidate running for office must have served in the military. And not as a cook. He or she must have seen real combat for at least 6 months (trips to the Bronx or Baltimore City don’t count). If you’re going to have the power to send our nation’s young men and women into war, you should have seen a little of it yourself (not just played the video game or rented the movie).
14) Every May 15th, elected officials have to defend their records thus far. Those found lacking by a majority of constituents are removed from office and must buy all their clothing at Walmart for 1 year. They will also be stripped naked and made to create a video apology for their failures that will be uploaded to youtube for all the world to see and scorn.
16)Supreme Court Justices no longer get lifetime gigs. After 15 years, they're gone. Poof. Not even the president of the country has job security; why should Justices? And on the topic of Justices, during the vetting/confirmation promise, questions about religion, political party affiliation, interracial or same-sex marriage, and sexual orientation are BANNED. The job of Supreme Court justices should be *just* to make sure that legislation suggested or passed by Congress and the president falls within the boundaries set by our U.S. Constitution. PERIOD. Let's go back to the job description of Justices being the determination of whether matters before the court pass the constitutional "smell test." Period. No more "appointing" presidents. No more deciding that corporations are people too (making it all too easy for foreign entities to exert untoward influence) and can make anonymous donations in infinite amounts to any candidate, in secrecy. By making positions on the highest Court lifetime positions, there is scant checks-and-balances on THEM. So limit the years that they can serve. By so doing, maybe we won't end up with a Supreme Court that, for the most part, looks a lot like it did decades ago--old white men who have long passed their shelf-life date.
UNENCUMBANT ACT OF 2011
The purpose of this act is to ensure that all voting citizens will be able to choose from a pool of candidates who exhibit common sense and stylish shoes, are well educated, rational, articulate, honest, well-coiffed, well-manicured, and just plain spiffy if solemn. (There are too many fugly people in Congress already. Don’t let any more in!) To assure all these requirements are met, from this day forward the following should become law of the land:
1) No one with the first name, maiden name, or surname of Bush, Kennedy, Kerry, Clinton, or Palin can run for higher office. Ever.
2) The name and person of Kenneth Starr shall be erased from mankind and history. So let it be written; so let it be done.
3) No candidate can have an income of more than $150,000 a year in the 10 years preceding running for office. It's about time the average American was actually represented BY an average American. All nominees must also have worked in the fast-food industry for at least 2 years at some point in their working career and have earned Employee Of The Month at least once during that time of employment.
4) All presidential candidates must be single and remain single while they serve. This way if the president wants to diddle someone with a cigar, it won't require 40 million dollars of taxpayer money to prove it. We might also be spared the hysterical ravings of the lunatic far left and far right who tout “family values” with one hand and fondle their or someone else's genitals with the other. It might also help keep certain members of Congress's legs in their *own* bathroom stall when they need to make use of public restroom facilities. Or deter them from going on 'weekenders' to South America while the rest of the state they supposedly represent wonders where the hell their representative IS.
5) Anyone running on a platform of “family values” or “traditional values” is immediately disqualified. Then stoned to death.
6) All candidates will be required to take a world geography and a spelling test.
7) Candidates will admit they inhaled. Often.
8) Everyone serving in the House, Senate, and White House must supply their own transportation and pay for their own vehicle, its maintenance, and gasoline usage. They'll be provided vouchers if they use public transportation. They must fly coach or business class, and have to stay at Holiday Inns when traveling domestically and in hostels when traveling abroad. They must pay for their own meals and the meals of special interests toadying up to them.
9) All lobbyists and special interest groups will be given 90 days to chose a new career path, after which time they will be burned at the stake or sent to North Korea.
10) All political parties will be abolished. No more Democrats, No more Republicans. No more Tea Party Patriots, No more Libertarians, Civiltarians, Vegetarians, Greenians, Martians, Lilliputians, or Rastafarians (well, maybe we'll keep Rastafarians). No more bullshit. Candidates run on their own merits with their own best ideas for their country’s betterment, not their party’s.
11) Taxes cannot be raised until 75% of the voting public agrees on the taxation, and those taxes can only be used to meet the needs of transportation, health, public safety (which includes police, fire, hospital), infrastructure, education, housing, and footwear. All social programs will be funded solely by voluntary taxation. You get to choose where your tax dollars go. No longer will you be forced to help pay for a billion-dollar bridge to nowhere or Donald Trump’s next bankruptcy.
12) All private and public contributions to all candidates will be banned forever. Candidates will be given 7 free airtime dates, an hour in length for each, on both network and cable news stations. The final 5 candidates will engage in 3 televised debates in which average citizens ask the questions and candidates aren’t prepped beforehand. All candidates will be given $350,000 from public monies to run for office. That’s it. Use the money wisely. Or go on a really fabulous cruise.
13) Any candidate running for office must have served in the military. And not as a cook. He or she must have seen real combat for at least 6 months (trips to the Bronx or Baltimore City don’t count). If you’re going to have the power to send our nation’s young men and women into war, you should have seen a little of it yourself (not just played the video game or rented the movie).
14) Every May 15th, elected officials have to defend their records thus far. Those found lacking by a majority of constituents are removed from office and must buy all their clothing at Walmart for 1 year. They will also be stripped naked and made to create a video apology for their failures that will be uploaded to youtube for all the world to see and scorn.
16)Supreme Court Justices no longer get lifetime gigs. After 15 years, they're gone. Poof. Not even the president of the country has job security; why should Justices? And on the topic of Justices, during the vetting/confirmation promise, questions about religion, political party affiliation, interracial or same-sex marriage, and sexual orientation are BANNED. The job of Supreme Court justices should be *just* to make sure that legislation suggested or passed by Congress and the president falls within the boundaries set by our U.S. Constitution. PERIOD. Let's go back to the job description of Justices being the determination of whether matters before the court pass the constitutional "smell test." Period. No more "appointing" presidents. No more deciding that corporations are people too (making it all too easy for foreign entities to exert untoward influence) and can make anonymous donations in infinite amounts to any candidate, in secrecy. By making positions on the highest Court lifetime positions, there is scant checks-and-balances on THEM. So limit the years that they can serve. By so doing, maybe we won't end up with a Supreme Court that, for the most part, looks a lot like it did decades ago--old white men who have long passed their shelf-life date.
22 August 2010
Reality Show Confessions
Apparently I am eating my own words (I once swore to never watch reality TV except for Survivor and The Amazing Race), but I find I like the taste of certain letters--like O (juicy and filling), B (honey-flavored), D (a full-bodied wine), J (tickles the throat), Q (like a good creme brulee), S (a cheese-oozy pizza with just the right amount of sauce and not a drop more), W (any drink with Grey Goose; your mood goes up and down and up and down based on how Goosed you get), Z (like a jalapeno pepper that sets each individual taste bud a-fire)--but I have found the alphabet to be quite palatable in certain situations.
Tori and Dean Inn Love (yes, I know the show's name has changed, but as I have the short-term memory of a gnat these days, I can't be expected to remember these things, or a lot of other things). Like most people probably, I figured her for yet one more talentless, overpriviledged, pampered child of a Hollywood actor/actress, producer, director. Let's be honest: no one would accuse her of being Oscar material, and some of the movies she has starred in? (My favorite is the ridiculously titled "Mother May I Sleep With Danger?" Can anything top that?) Anyway, bad actress she may be, but starring as herself? Perfect. Very sweet; a good mother; hard-working; genuine; generous; bitter-free though she has every right to be bitter given her hideous mother and being cheated out of what I would consider her rightful inheritance when her father died. Aaron Spelling was worth millions (billions?), and his widow is either so vengeful or so Scrooge-like that she couldn't part with a few million for her own daughter? I find that unfathomable. Especially considering Tori is very much a hard-working modern woman. Beyond spending lots of time and obviously lots of money on repeated cosmetic surgeries, is her mother half the worker bee her daughter is?
Anyway, I just love their show. She and Dean are good together and good parents; their children are adorable. With so much negativity in the world these days, their show is light-hearted and soothing. And just plain entertaining. And their show always makes me laugh at some point.
I started watching Gene Simmons Family Jewels out of curiosity. I was never a big KISS fan and Simmons in particular kind of creeped me out. But I love the show! He is Trump-like (and I mean that as a compliment, though I loathe Trump to the marrow of my bones) in that everything is a potential business opportunity. He's an obvious loving and doting father, and his children walk right over him regularly, lol. Shannon is every bit his match and a great mom. And I don't know why, but it amazes me how "normal" and without guile both of their children are. They seem well-grounded, which I would imagine is no easy feat in Hollyweird. And I would give a kidney to live in their home. What a gorgeous place.
Kirstie Alley's Big Life keeps me in constant hysterics. Her household is so wonderfully dysfunctional, how can you not love watching them interact? And pet lemurs? Where else but in Hollywood, lol. Though I wish she'd ditch her UNhandyman, Jim. I think he takes complete advantage of her generosity, though maybe that's just the editing. Either way, he is the only person on the show I don't like. I know the show hasn't had the most stellar ratings and it may even be off the air by now (come to think of it, I haven't seen an episode in some time; I just assumed they were on hiatus), but I think it's a great show. And I think it takes a lot of courage to be so open about her weight problems to the whole world, essentially putting herself out there to be ridiculed. You go, girl! (One eensy criticism: Do her kids do anything at all besides hang around the house? Not that they need to work for a living, but they seem to be completely aimless.)
Survivor. Still my favorite reality show (with the exception of the first two seasons and the New Orleans season of MTV's Real World). And if you haven't bothered checking out Survivor Sucks (http://survivorsucks.com/), you are depriving yourself of some terrific, hilarious commentary and even neologisms by the Suckster crowd. Some of my favorite expressions have come from that forum. Warning: not for the faint-hearted or the easily offended. Because nothing is sacred on Sucks. Everything and everyone is fair game for shredding. And the regulars joyfully take full advantage of the first amendment's right to free speech. But back to the show. How can you not love the Survivor lexicon alone? Pagonged. Ulonged. Tribal Council. Amanda-cide. Flying under the radar. Riding coattails. Curse of the car. The food challenge. Reward challenge. Immunity challenge. Immunity idol. Forming alliances. The Merge. "The tribe has spoken." "Survivors on your mark!" "Fire means life." The jury. The finale. And on and on. All of it a permanent part of our social culture, and yay for it. Pearl Island is still my favorite season, and the Robfather still my favorite player, but each and every season, even the "boring" ones, have their moments. And bless Jeff Probst in blue. Or in the buff. Preferably in the buff!
Tori and Dean Inn Love (yes, I know the show's name has changed, but as I have the short-term memory of a gnat these days, I can't be expected to remember these things, or a lot of other things). Like most people probably, I figured her for yet one more talentless, overpriviledged, pampered child of a Hollywood actor/actress, producer, director. Let's be honest: no one would accuse her of being Oscar material, and some of the movies she has starred in? (My favorite is the ridiculously titled "Mother May I Sleep With Danger?" Can anything top that?) Anyway, bad actress she may be, but starring as herself? Perfect. Very sweet; a good mother; hard-working; genuine; generous; bitter-free though she has every right to be bitter given her hideous mother and being cheated out of what I would consider her rightful inheritance when her father died. Aaron Spelling was worth millions (billions?), and his widow is either so vengeful or so Scrooge-like that she couldn't part with a few million for her own daughter? I find that unfathomable. Especially considering Tori is very much a hard-working modern woman. Beyond spending lots of time and obviously lots of money on repeated cosmetic surgeries, is her mother half the worker bee her daughter is?
Anyway, I just love their show. She and Dean are good together and good parents; their children are adorable. With so much negativity in the world these days, their show is light-hearted and soothing. And just plain entertaining. And their show always makes me laugh at some point.
I started watching Gene Simmons Family Jewels out of curiosity. I was never a big KISS fan and Simmons in particular kind of creeped me out. But I love the show! He is Trump-like (and I mean that as a compliment, though I loathe Trump to the marrow of my bones) in that everything is a potential business opportunity. He's an obvious loving and doting father, and his children walk right over him regularly, lol. Shannon is every bit his match and a great mom. And I don't know why, but it amazes me how "normal" and without guile both of their children are. They seem well-grounded, which I would imagine is no easy feat in Hollyweird. And I would give a kidney to live in their home. What a gorgeous place.
Kirstie Alley's Big Life keeps me in constant hysterics. Her household is so wonderfully dysfunctional, how can you not love watching them interact? And pet lemurs? Where else but in Hollywood, lol. Though I wish she'd ditch her UNhandyman, Jim. I think he takes complete advantage of her generosity, though maybe that's just the editing. Either way, he is the only person on the show I don't like. I know the show hasn't had the most stellar ratings and it may even be off the air by now (come to think of it, I haven't seen an episode in some time; I just assumed they were on hiatus), but I think it's a great show. And I think it takes a lot of courage to be so open about her weight problems to the whole world, essentially putting herself out there to be ridiculed. You go, girl! (One eensy criticism: Do her kids do anything at all besides hang around the house? Not that they need to work for a living, but they seem to be completely aimless.)
Survivor. Still my favorite reality show (with the exception of the first two seasons and the New Orleans season of MTV's Real World). And if you haven't bothered checking out Survivor Sucks (http://survivorsucks.com/), you are depriving yourself of some terrific, hilarious commentary and even neologisms by the Suckster crowd. Some of my favorite expressions have come from that forum. Warning: not for the faint-hearted or the easily offended. Because nothing is sacred on Sucks. Everything and everyone is fair game for shredding. And the regulars joyfully take full advantage of the first amendment's right to free speech. But back to the show. How can you not love the Survivor lexicon alone? Pagonged. Ulonged. Tribal Council. Amanda-cide. Flying under the radar. Riding coattails. Curse of the car. The food challenge. Reward challenge. Immunity challenge. Immunity idol. Forming alliances. The Merge. "The tribe has spoken." "Survivors on your mark!" "Fire means life." The jury. The finale. And on and on. All of it a permanent part of our social culture, and yay for it. Pearl Island is still my favorite season, and the Robfather still my favorite player, but each and every season, even the "boring" ones, have their moments. And bless Jeff Probst in blue. Or in the buff. Preferably in the buff!
Who Are These Kardashians and Why Should We Care?
Have I been asleep like Rip van Winkle the past few years (okay, so in a sense, I was)? Can someone enlighten me as to who these creatures are, why they appear on my television constantly, no matter the channel? Are they like Paris Hilton, famous just for the sake of being famous or for having vile tempers or a really good PR person? Or desperately trying to be famous with the help of a greedy PR person? Just the little I've seen about them makes me think, aha! I have an idea for a new cable channel - VAPID. That could be the new cable channel home for people like these Kardashians; Paris Hilton; Lindsay Lohan and her mother; Kate Gosselin; Naomi Campbell; the Octomom; Jessica Simpleton, err, Simpson and her sibling; Anna-Nicole Smith (whoops, cross that one off), and whatever other celebrities, self-described or otherwise, who waste our precious viewing time? (Also add all those desperately-seeking-mate-and-15-minutes-of-fame-I-can-parlay-into-a-career women who appear on The Bachelor.) Corral them all onto just this channel and then the rest of the 100 or so channels would be blissfully "celebrity" free for you and me. I mean, just imagine all the people watching TV in peace? Yes, I may be a dreamer, but I know I'm not the only one.
25 April 2010
Larry King - ICK
So he's getting divorced for like the 9th time? I find it hard to believe someone married him for a FIRST time. The guy is creepy, squared. Can you imagine being intimate with that? Ewwwwww! And I'm still struggling as to the point of his show's existence in the first place. Is it because he kisses the asses of his guests?
Publish Post
07 August 2007
...if you breed it you must feed it...
Here's a thought. If you can't afford to have a child, and all that goes with it -- feeding it, clothing it, taking it to the doctor's, the dentist's, the eye doctor's, buying it school supplies, starting a college nest egg -- here's a novel idea: DON'T HAVE CHILDREN. Do you ever wonder how many bills have been passed to "protect" children all because parents can't do the jobs themselves? When is enough, enough? As a taxpayer, aren't you tired of your money going to irresponsible breeders? (And I'm not talking about parents whose main problem is they can't afford healthcare for their children. Equal and affordable access to healthcare is a whole other problem our government stubbornly ignores with the willfullness of a 3 year old.) I'm talking about single mothers, those who struggle paycheck to paycheck, those with low-paying jobs or no job who get pregnant and *then* wonder how they're going to support the child (if they think about that at all).
I say bring back the stigma of getting pregnant outside of wedlock at a young age. Bring back the stigma of needing public assistance. Maybe a little shame is a good thing if it keeps people from repeatedly feeding from the public trough. It's one thing to need assistance when you fall on hard times. No one can plan for a catastrophic illness or accident, or suddenly losing your job. You can and SHOULD plan to have and raise children. Considering the rate of population increase, just in this country alone in the last 30 years, apparently people give as much thought to reproduction as they do to defecation, which is damned little. I've grown weary of my taxes going up faster than a helium balloon to support or extend or create social programs for people who don't know any better and never will or just don't care.
And for those people in favor of their taxes being used for social assistance programs, that's great! Have at it. But let it be an individual taxpayer decision.
I say bring back the stigma of getting pregnant outside of wedlock at a young age. Bring back the stigma of needing public assistance. Maybe a little shame is a good thing if it keeps people from repeatedly feeding from the public trough. It's one thing to need assistance when you fall on hard times. No one can plan for a catastrophic illness or accident, or suddenly losing your job. You can and SHOULD plan to have and raise children. Considering the rate of population increase, just in this country alone in the last 30 years, apparently people give as much thought to reproduction as they do to defecation, which is damned little. I've grown weary of my taxes going up faster than a helium balloon to support or extend or create social programs for people who don't know any better and never will or just don't care.
And for those people in favor of their taxes being used for social assistance programs, that's great! Have at it. But let it be an individual taxpayer decision.
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